My life with children right now involves screaming. A LOT of screaming. And crying. And hair pulling. And hitting. And throwing. And tantrums...over everything. We basically have child # 1 (Lili) who is communicating fairly well, but doesn't always understand why her brother is the way he is. Then we have child # 2 (Will) who wants to be just like the big kids and is very frustrated that he can't always convey what he wants. What this results in is a battle of wills...and a potent mix of personalities. I 'get' what each of them is going through, but I don't necessarily know how to deal with the constant mad chaos!
I know that Lili is at an age where she can't quite understand why her brother gets away with certain things and why she is expected to handle situations differently. Why is brother 'allowed' to act up at the dinner table, but she is not? I've tried explaining to her that Will is still little and still learning...and we have to set a good example for him so he knows how to behave. At the age of 2, she doesn't care about that. She just wants to see that we respond to him doing those things the same way we respond to her........and we do, to a certain extent...however they are at different stages and what works for one, doesn't always work for the other.
Will is just one frustrated little boy! He wants SO badly to be heard...and we try...we really, really try...but it's just not enough for him right now. Everything is a struggle, but when we DO get it 'right' he is such a happy little man. He wants to be free to run and play and be crazy. He doesn't want to sit still or be quiet. He wants to follow his sister around and if she takes something from him, he attacks her like a rabid animal. Hitting and pulling her hair are his favorite revenge.
I can't wait until we are through this stage. I know they will bicker and fight for the rest of their lives, but at least at some point I will feel as though when I talk to them...and explain things...and reprimand...that maybe, just maybe, they will understand. Here's to hoping for easier communication in the near future!
Royal Mickey & Minnie Birthday Party
1 week ago
1 comment:
Re: Lili, Carter goes through the same thing. It helps to assure him that when he was Henri's age we let him do the very same thing. I try to side with Carter because I'm the oldest in my family, but I also have him clean up toys that I know he didn't pull out, etc. I tell him I cleaned up after him for the first 2 years or so, now he can clean up after Henri and then Henri can clean up after the baby.
with Will, Carter went through the same thing. 16-18 months when he was trying to communicate was as bad as potty training with him. Seriously, I would have sent him off and gotten him back at 18 months and been happy.
Henri on the other hand chatters away and if you look like you understand he happily walks off. I'm so glad, because I DREADED this age after what I went through with Carter. I swear everyday Carter and I were both in tears because we didn't understand each other.
I promise 18 or 19 months he'll "get" it. Something will click and it will be ok. Hang in there!
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